Ignacio “Nacho” Rivera is from The Eccentrics. Goofy and energetic, he’s proud of the fact that he’s unusual. Nacho goes through life enjoying being himself and living outside the box.
Tag Archives: The Eccentrics
Michelle and Marissa
Michelle Slojinski is a substitute teacher at SSCHS. Shy and insecure, she is a talented artist, but a history of being ostracized and mental health problems stand in the way of reaching her dream of being an art teacher. She tries to move forward with her life, but sometimes, she finds that her past will slow her down unless she can deal with it.
Marissa Nogales is from The Eccentrics. A non-conformist and artist, she believes in eschewing conformity in every aspect of her life, from bizarre pieces of art in all forms, to sense of fashion. For her, the only rule that matters is “Do what YOU like.”
Kelly Takahashi
Another character from Tweens, (cousin of Jack and Jace and sister of Jason, Jake) Kelly was one of the favorites that I had imagined.
She is a sweet girl who is kind to most people, though she’s not without flaws, in that she is ditzy and clumsy. She often causes problem for her friends, but nonetheless is always tried her best to do the right thing.
Eventhough I lost interest in Tweens, I did use some elements of Kelly in other characters. Riley Diamond is based on her personality, sweet ditzy, and engaging, but Riley is also far more weirder and has more quirks than Kelly does. Also, I decided put some of Kelly’s clumsiness in the character of Luna Santiago, but on a far larger scale, making Kelly look graceful in comparison.
Hannah Harper
Hannah Harper is a supporting character from The Eccentrics. She is Rod’s older sister.
Hannah is the type of person is always willing to lend a helping hand, even as she struggles with her own issues. Hannah often acts as a “team mom” of sorts to Rod and his friends, but has difficulties in her own with relationships, which she tries to distract herself from by focusing on others.
Ode to TV Tropes
One of my absolute favorite websites on the Internet is TV Tropes. TV Tropes, whose full name is Television Tropes and Idioms, is a wiki that is devoted to cataloging various types of narrative devices, or tropes as they call them. Despite its name, it not devoted solely to tropes from TV; it covers tropes from literature, film, music, comic books, video games legends, folklore, mythology, religion, the Internet and real life.
The site first began as a collection of tropes from the popular series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, in 2004. In the nine years since, TV Tropes expand tremendously to all types of media.
I first began using the site regularly in about late 2010. I was so entranced by it. There was so much information on various shows and movies that I had never found anywhere else; it most certainly was not on Wikipedia (which TV Tropes calls “The Other Wiki”). It was also a good place to learn about narrative tropes and help aid writers in developing plot occurrences and characters. I am happy that it helped give me direction in the development of one of my characters, Riley Diamond I used the trope called Cloudcuckoolander, which denotes a character who is odd and seemingly out of touch with reality. I’ve since used the site to help develop other tropes in my other ideas.
I cannot say enough good things about it. However, I will point out that due to the fact that it is a wiki, and therefore, can be edited by anybody, it is not suitable for academic research for essays and the like, just like Wikipedia. Not to mention, it has very few sources, and therefore, it has almost no verification of the information listed. However, much of the information can be confirmed by viewing or reading the media discussed.
However, the main strength of TV Tropes is its community of lovers of all type of media and wealth of perspectives.
I plan on devoting several future posts to various tropes listed on TV Tropes, but for now, I will briefly discuss a few of my favorite entries.
This focuses on tropes that are subjective. They may involve differences of opinions on characters such as whether a character is unlikable or whether a plot element is weak or strong.
Designated Heroes and Designated Villains
These are YMMV tropes. They refer to characters who are intended by the writers to be heroes or villains but who are perceived as unlikable or even villainous in the cases of designated heroes or likable, sympathetic, and even heroic in the cases of designated villains. This often happens because writers do not realize that they are making their heroes unlikable or their villains likable.
As mentioned above, this a character who does odd things, and who seems to have his or her head in the clouds, so to speak.
This character is mean girl of the school. She does everything to assert her popularity and make the lives of the so-called unpopular kids a living hell.
Another YMMV trope, this refers to characters who something that causes the audience or reader to think or say “What an Idiot.” Many of examples listed on the site are structures as follows.
Situation
You’d Expect:
Instead:
This refers to a phenomena that has mostly died out in musical films where if the actors did not have suitable singing voices, either in general or for the material at hand, then professional singer would record their musical numbers, and it is the singer’s voice, not the actor’s voice, heard during the musical numbers. Occasionally, as in the film versions of the musicals West Side Story, The Sound of Music, and My Fair Lady, certain actors sang their songs only to have them re-recorded by more skilled skilled singers. This has also happened in various animated musical films of the 1990s, particularly those done by Disney.
The Completed First Draft of My Very First Screenplay
Months later, I decided to return to my screenplay. I knew that I would have to make some changed, but first, I felt that I should complete it, or at least complete as much as possible. I made some revisions, shared it online in order to get feedback, made more revisions, and then I finally completed the first draft.
Here the first incomplete draft that I shared.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
RILEY DIAMOND walks into her bedroom wearing a bathrobe and
shower cap. She goes into her drawers and picks up some
clothes. She sees looks at a pair of her socks, drops the
rest of her clothing and storms into her brother ZEKE
DIAMOND’s room. Zeke is sitting at his computer. Riley
turns his chair around and show him her sock.
RILEY
What is this?
ZEKE
A sock.
RILEY
(agitated)
Don’t play dumb! What is this
stain on my sock?!
ZEKE
I thought it was mine. Then I
realized it wasn’t, but it was so
soft I kept on…
RILEY
(in a disgusted voice,
yelling)
Stop! Why would you do that?
ZEKE
It was an accident. Stop being a
drama queen.
RILEY
But the socks were very special to
me, and I spent a lot of money for
them.
ZEKE
Well, it was stupid to buy socks
for 200 dollars.
RILEY
You didn’t see the woman who sold
them to me. Her boyfriend got her
pregnant and left her four times.
She was broke and desperate. I
wanted to do what I could to help.
Zeke looks at Riley like she is stupid and oblivious.
RILEY (CONT’D)
But anyway, that doesn’t change how
I feel. Use your own socks or
articles of clothing next time.
Riley stomps out of the room crying and yelling and slams
Zeke’s door.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – THE NEXT MORNING
Riley is wearing a back pack and standing at her locker
opening it frowning when her best friend MARISSA NOGALES
walks up to her.
MARISSA
Hey, Riley! What’s up?
RILEY
(in a sad voice)
My brother that’s what’s up!
MARISSA
(concerned)
What did Zeke do?
RILEY
Riley opens her backpack, and pulls out a large Ziploc bag
with a white sock in it.
He ruined my sock!
MARISSA
How?
Riley shoves the plastic bag into Marissa’s face.
RILEY
Look very closely.
Marissa scrunches her eyes and face while looking at the sock
through the bag.
MARISSA
I see a yellow stain. What is
that? Mustard? Paint?
RILEY
Let’s just say that my brother did
something to please himself.
MARISSA
Gross!
RILEY
I know! It was so special to me.
When that lady sold it to me, I
loved how I was able to help ease
her pain and help her feed her
children. And now every time I
look at I imagine what Zeke and
that lady’s love child would look
like
Riley shudders.
MARISSA
Have you talked to him?
RILEY
Well, no. I mean, I kind of just
yelled and cried and stomped and
acted like a huge baby. Maybe I
should talk to Zeke again.
MARISSA
I’m just glad my brothers don’t use
socks.
RILEY
How would you know such a thing?
Marissa shudders.
MARISSA
Let’s just drop it okay.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – LATER THAT AFTERNOON
Riley is sitting on the sofa in her living while on her
laptop. Zeke walks into the living room.
RILEY
Hi, Zeke!
ZEKE
(feeling despondent)
Hi, Riley.
Riley stands up and walks to Zeke.
RILEY
I just wanted to say I’m sorry.
About last night, I mean.
ZEKE
Apology accepted.
Zeke tried to walk around Riley, but she stops him
RILEY
Hey, hey, hey, wait. You’re
supposed to apologize to me too.
ZEKE
Yeah…not gonna happen.
RILEY
(yelling)
But that’s not fair you knew that
was my favorite sock!
ZEKE
I didn’t know it at the time!
RILEY
Well, you should have!
ZEKE
I’m not about the apologize for
ruining a cheap-ass sock that you
were scammed into buying. Excuse
me, I gotta work on my English
essay.
Zeke walks away to his room. Riley who is furious walks to
the bathroom, and she picks up his blue electric toothbrush.
RILEY
I guess, I shall fight fire with
fire.
Riley closes the bathroom door, and the sound of herself
brushing her teeth can be heard.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – THE NEXT MORNING
Riley walks past the bathroom where Zeke is brushing his
teeth. She starts to chuckle. Zeke spits out his
toothpaste.
ZEKE
What’s so funny?
RILEY
(laughing)
Nothing. Just felt like havin’ a
good laugh. Sometimes when
everything seems bad laughing for
no reason can help.
ZEKE
(feeling as though Riley
is just being her usual
oddball self)
Whatever.
Riley walks downstairs.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – LATER THAT DAY
Riley is walking to class when her phones rings. She has a
text message from her ex-boyfriend KENDALL LEWIS. Riley gets
overly excited and oblivious to the fact that other students
in the hall are staring at her with bewilderment, she reads
the message. It says: “Meet me for lunch. I need to tell you
something.” Riley squeals in an expression of excessive
excitement.
Riley runs down the hall to Marissa’s locker.
RILEY
Marissa, I’ve got great news.
Kendall wants to talk.
MARISSA
That’s great, girl.
RILEY
Maybe he wants to get back
together. Oh my god, I have to get
ready. Anyways, I gotta go to
class, I’ll tell you all about it
after school. Bye.
MARISSA
I’ll see you! Good luck!
Riley runs off to class.
INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA – AFTERNOON
Riley walks around the cafeteria to the table where her exboyfriend
KENDALL LEWIS is sitting.
KENDALL
Riley!
RILEY
Kendall! Hi.
KENDALL
So…how’s it goin’
RILEY
I’ve been fine. I had an issue
with by little brother, but I’ve
taken care of it.
Riley sits down next to Kendall and moves very close to him
in an amorous manner.
RILEY (CONT’D)
(speaking in a low,
somewhat seductive voice)
So what was it you wanted to talk
to me about?
KENDALL
Well….this is kinda hard to
say…well….um….I went to
the….doctor yesterday, and um she
told me that I might mono.
RILEY
(screaming)
WHAT?!
KENDALL
I just thought that I should tell
you that….just So that you would
know and check yourself.
Riley starts to feel sad.
RILEY
Oh my god! I have to go!
Riley runs out of the cafeteria crying.
INT. RILEY’S BEDROOM
Marissa is comforting Riley after the revelation that Kendall
gave her.
RILEY
(crying)
I can’t believe I might have mono!
MARISSA
Look, Riley, calm down. You gotta
keep your head up. You might not
have mono, and besides, it very
treatable anyways.
RILEY
I know its just, I feel so dirty.
Like I’m a horrible person.
Riley suddenly remembers something
RILEY (CONT’D)
Oh, my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! I
AM a horrible person.
MARISSA
Look, its not your fault!
RILEY
No! I might have given it to Zeke.
MARISSA
I’m confused.
RILEY
The other night, I was still mad at
him for ruining my favorite sock!
So I got revenge! I brushed my
teeth with his toothbrush.
MARISSA
There…are just no words.
RILEY
I know! Now what do I do?!
MARISSA
You gotta come clean.
RILEY
(feeling hesitant)
Okay. Zeke can you come here?!
Zeke walks into Riley’s bedroom.
ZEKE
What?
RILEY
You remember the whole thing with
you and my favorite sock and how
you did apologize?
ZEKE
(confused)
Yeah?
Well, I thought that you needed to
be punished. So I brushed my teeth
with your toothbrush.
Zeke gags in disgust.
RILEY (CONT’D)
Wait, there’s more. Kendall, you
know my ex, told me that he might
have mono so I might’ve given it to
you.
ZEKE
OK, now I gotta lay down!
MARISSA
Look, Zeke, we don’t know for sure
yet.
ZEKE
That don’t matter! That’s just
nasty!
Here is the second incomplete draft:
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
RILEY DIAMOND walks into her bedroom wearing pajamas. She
opens her laptop computer, types in her password, screams,
looks disturbed, picks up her laptop, and storms out in to
her younger brother ZEKE DIAMOND’s bedroom where he is on
his own computer.
RILEY
What the hell’s this?
ZEKE
Ah, yeah! I went to that site
before I got my computer back
today.
RILEY
(agitated) Oh my god! That’s
gross! Why would you use my
computer and without askin’!
ZEKE
I just couldn’t weight any longer
for them to fix my computer.
RILEY
(in a disgusted voice,
yelling) You tainted my
computer
ZEKE
Stop bein’ a drama queen. Just
delete the history.
RILEY
That’s not the point! You don’t use
my computer without asking! And
especially not to look at nasty
stuff! Riley slams her laptop shut,
stomps out of the room, crying and
yelling, and slams Zeke’s door.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – THE NEXT MORNING
Riley is wearing a back pack and standing at her locker
opening it frowning when her best friend MARISSA NOGALES
walks up to her.
MARISSA
Hey, Riley! What’s up?
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.
RILEY
(in a sad voice) My brother
that’s what’s up!
MARISSA
(concerned) What did Zeke do?
RILEY
He used my laptop without asking!
And he left a surprise
MARISSA
What do you mean?
RILEY
Come with me. Riley and Marissa
walk to the girl’s bathroom and go
into a stall. Riley then takes her
laptop out of her backpack, opens
it types in her password, and shows
it to Marissa.
RILEY (CONT’D)
Look very closely. Marissa looks
disturbed.
MARISSA
That’s gross! Marissa looks
confused.
MARISSA (CONT’D)
And painful. Can you really do
that? Riley closes her laptop.
RILEY
I can’t believe he did that. I wish
I could unsee things. Why do boys
have to be so perverted? Riley
growls in aggravation.
MARISSA
Look girl. Just talk to him be
firm.
RILEY
Well, when I found out I kinda
acted like a big baby. I feel dumb.
MARISSA
Just sit Zeke down. Be nice.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.
RILEY
Okay. I’ll do that.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – LATER THAT AFTERNOON
Riley is sitting on the sofa in her living while on her
laptop. Zeke walks into the living room.
RILEY
(cheeful) Hi, Zeke!
ZEKE
(feeling despondent) Hi,
Riley. Riley stands up and
walks to Zeke.
RILEY
I just wanted to say I’m sorry.
About last night, I mean.
ZEKE
Apology accepted. Zeke tries to
walk around Riley, but she stops
him.
RILEY
Hey, hey, hey, wait. You’re
supposed to apologize to me too.
ZEKE
Yeah…not gonna happen. Zeke once
again tries to walk around Riley,
and she once again stops him.
RILEY
(yelling) But that’s not fair.
You used my laptop without
asking.
ZEKE
So! All you gotta do is just erase
the history!
RILE
You should’ve done that! In fact,
don’t use my laptop without
permission!
ZEKE
I’m not about the apologize for
making you see somethin’ that you
see in the girls’ locker room
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.
ZEKE (cont’d)
everyday. Now excuse me. I gotta
work on my English essay.
Zeke walks around Riley away to his room. Riley who is
furious walks to the bathroom, and she picks up his blue
electric toothbrush.
RILEY
I guess, I shall fight fire with
fire. Riley closes the bathroom
door, and the sound of herself
brushing her teeth can be heard.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – THE NEXT MORNING
Riley walks past the bathroom where Zeke is brushing his
teeth. She starts to chuckle. Zeke spits out his toothpaste.
ZEKE
What’s so funny?
RILEY
(laughing) Nothing. Just felt
like havin’ a good laugh.
Sometimes when everything
seems bad laughing for no
reason can help.
ZEKE
(feeling as though Riley is
just being her usual oddball
self) Whatever. Riley walks
downstairs.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – LATER THAT DAY
Riley is walking to class when her phones rings. She has a
text message from her ex-boyfriend KENDALL LEWIS. Riley gets
overly excited and oblivious to the fact that other students
in the hall are staring at her with bewilderment, she reads
the message. It says: “Meet me for lunch. I need to tell you
something.” Riley squeals in an expression of excessive
excitement. Riley runs down the hall to Marissa’s locker.
RILEY
Marissa, I’ve got great news.
Kendall wants to talk.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 5.
MARISSA
That’s great, girl.
RILEY
Maybe he wants to get back
together. Oh my god, I have to get
ready. Anyways, I gotta go to
class, I’ll tell you all about it
after school. Bye.
MARISSA
I’ll see you! Good luck! Riley runs
off to class.
INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA – AFTERNOON
Riley walks around the cafeteria to the table where her
ex-boyfriend KENDALL LEWIS is sitting.
KENDALL
Riley!
RILEY
Kendall! Hi.
KENDALL
So…how’s it goin’
RILEY
I’ve been fine. I had an issue with
by little brother, but I’ve taken
care of it. Riley sits down next to
Kendall and moves very close to him
in an amorous manner.
RILEY (CONT’D)
(speaking in a low, somewhat
seductive voice) So what was
it you wanted to talk to me
about?
KENDALL
Well….this is kinda hard to
say…well….um….I went to
the….doctor yesterday, and um she
told me that I might mono.
RILEY
(screaming)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 6.
WHAT?! KENDALL
I just thought that I should tell
you that….just So that you would
know and check yourself. Riley
starts to feel sad.
RILEY
Oh my god! I have to go! Riley runs
out of the cafeteria crying.
INT. RILEY’S BEDROOM
Marissa is comforting Riley.
RILEY
(crying) I can’t believe I
might have mono!
MARISSA
Look, Riley, calm down. You gotta
keep your head up. You might not
have mono, and besides, it very
treatable anyways.
RILEY
I know its just, I feel so dirty.
Like I’m a horrible person. Riley
suddenly remembers something
RILEY (CONT’D)
Oh, my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! I
AM a horrible person.
MARISSA
Look, its not your fault!
RILEY
No! I might have given it to Zeke.
MARISSA
I’m confused.
RILEY
The other night, I was still mad at
him for ruining my favorite sock!
So I got revenge! I brushed my
teeth with his toothbrush.
MARISSA
There…are just no words.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 7.
RILEY
I know! Now what do I do?!
MARISSA
You gotta come clean.
RILEY
(feeling hesitant) Okay. Zeke
can you come here?! Zeke walks
into Riley’s bedroom.
ZEKE
What?
RILEY
You remember the whole thing with
you looking at porn on my laptop?
ZEKE
(confused) Yeah?
RILEY
Well, I thought that you needed to
be punished. So I brushed my teeth
with your toothbrush. Zeke gags in
disgust.
RILEY (CONT’D)
Wait, there’s more. Kendall, you
know my ex, told me that he might
have mono so I might’ve given it to
you.
ZEKE
OK, now I gotta lay down!
MARISSA
Look, Zeke, we don’t know for sure
yet.
ZEKE
That don’t matter! That’s just
nasty!
And here is the completed first draft:
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
RILEY DIAMOND walks into her bedroom wearing pajamas. She
opens her laptop computer, types in her password, screams,
looks disturbed, picks up her laptop, and storms out in to
her younger brother ZEKE DIAMOND’S bedroom where he at his
desk and is on his own computer. She turns his chair and
shows him her laptop.
RILEY
What the hell’s this?
ZEKE
Ah, yeah! I went to that site
before I got my computer back
today.
RILEY
(agitated)
Oh my god! That’s gross! Why
would you use my computer and
without askin’!
ZEKE
I just couldn’t weight any longer
for them to fix my computer.
RILEY
(disgusted)
You tainted my computer!
ZEKE
Stop bein’ a drama queen. Just
delete the history.
RILEY
That’s not the point! You don’t use
my computer without asking! And
especially not to look at nasty
stuff!
Riley slams her laptop shut, stomps out of the room, crying
and yelling, and slams Zeke’s door.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – THE NEXT MORNING
Riley is wearing a back pack and standing at her locker
opening it frowning when her best friend MARISSA NOGALES
walks up to her.
MARISSA
Hey, Riley! What’s up?
RILEY
(frustrated)
My brother that’s what’s up!
MARISSA
(concerned)
What did Zeke do?
RILEY
He used my laptop without asking!
And he left a surprise
MARISSA
What do you mean?
RILEY
Come with me.
Riley and Marissa walk to the girl’s bathroom and go into a
stall. Riley then takes her laptop out of her backpack,
opens it types in her password, and shows it to Marissa.
RILEY (CONT’D)
Look very closely.
Marissa looks disturbed.
MARISSA
That’s gross!
Marissa looks confused.
MARISSA (CONT’D)
And painful. Can you really do
that?
Riley closes her laptop.
RILEY
I can’t believe he did that. I
wish I could unsee things. Why do
boys have to be so perverted?
Riley growls in aggravation.
MARISSA
Look girl. Just talk to him be
firm.
RILEY
Well, when I found out I kinda
acted like a big baby. I feel
dumb.
MARISSA
Just sit Zeke down. Be nice.
RILEY
Okay. I’ll do that.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – LATER THAT AFTERNOON
Riley is sitting on the sofa in her living while on her
laptop. Zeke walks into the living room.
RILEY
(cheeful)
Hi, Zeke!
ZEKE
(feeling despondent)
Hi, Riley.
Riley stands up and walks to Zeke.
RILEY
I just wanted to say I’m sorry.
About last night, I mean.
ZEKE
Apology accepted.
Zeke tries to walk around Riley, but she stops him.
RILEY
Hey, hey, hey, wait. You’re
supposed to apologize to me too.
ZEKE
Yeah…not gonna happen.
Zeke once again tries to walk around Riley, and she once
again stops him.
RILEY
(yelling)
But that’s not fair. You used my
laptop without asking.
ZEKE
So! All you gotta do is just erase
the history!
RILE
You should’ve done that! In fact,
don’t use my laptop without
permission!
ZEKE
I’m not about the apologize for
making you see somethin’ that you
see in the girls’ locker room
everyday. Now excuse me. I gotta
work on my English essay.
Zeke walks around Riley away to his room. Riley who is
furious walks to the bathroom, and she picks up his blue
electric toothbrush.
RILEY
I guess, I shall fight fire with
fire. Good thing Zeke always
sanitizes his toothbrush.
Riley closes the bathroom door, and the sound of herself
brushing her teeth can be heard.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – THE NEXT MORNING
Riley walks past the bathroom where Zeke is brushing his
teeth. She starts to chuckle. Zeke spits out his
toothpaste.
ZEKE
What’s so funny?
RILEY
(laughing)
Nothing. Just felt like havin’ a
good laugh. Sometimes when
everything seems bad laughing for
no reason can help.
ZEKE
(feeling as though Riley
is just being weird)
Whatever.
Riley walks downstairs.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY – LATER THAT DAY
Riley is walking to class when her phones rings. She has a
text message from her ex-boyfriend KENDALL LEWIS. Riley
gets overly excited and oblivious to the fact that other
students in the hall are staring at her with bewilderment,
she reads the message. It says: “Meet me for lunch. I need
to tell you something.” Riley squeals in an expression of
excessive excitement.
Riley runs down the hall to Marissa’s locker.
RILEY
Marissa, I’ve got great news.
Kendall wants to talk.
MARISSA
That’s great, girl.
RILEY
Maybe he wants to get back
together. Oh my god, I have to get
ready. Anyways, I gotta go to
class, I’ll tell you all about it
after school. Bye.
MARISSA
I’ll see you! Good luck!
Riley runs off to class.
INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA – AFTERNOON
Riley walks around the cafeteria to the table where her
ex-boyfriend KENDALL LEWIS is sitting.
KENDALL
Riley!
RILEY
Kendall! Hi.
KENDALL
So…how’s it goin’
RILEY
I’ve been fine. I had an issue
with by little brother, but I’ve
taken care of it.
Riley sits down next to Kendall and moves very close to him
in an amorous manner.
RILEY (CONT’D)
(speaking in a low,
somewhat seductive voice)
(MORE)
So what was it you wanted to talk
RILEY (CONT’D) (CONT’D)
to me about?
KENDALL
Well….this is kinda hard to
say…well….um….I went to
the….doctor yesterday, and um she
told me that I might mono.
RILEY
(screaming)
WHAT?!
KENDALL
I just thought that I should tell
you that….just So that you would
know and check yourself.
Riley starts to feel sad.
RILEY
Oh my god! I have to go!
Riley runs out of the cafeteria crying.
INT. RILEY’S BEDROOM
Marissa is comforting Riley.
RILEY
(crying)
I can’t believe I might have mono!
MARISSA
Look, Riley, calm down. You gotta
keep your head up. You might not
have mono, and besides, it very
treatable anyways.
RILEY
I know its just, I feel so dirty.
Like I’m a horrible person.
Riley suddenly remembers something
RILEY (CONT’D)
Oh, my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! I
AM a horrible person.
MARISSA
Look, its not your fault!
RILEY
No! I might have given it to Zeke.
MARISSA
I’m confused.
RILEY
The other night, I was still mad at
him for ruining my favorite sock!
So I got revenge! I brushed my
teeth with his toothbrush.
MARISSA
There…are just no words.
RILEY
I know! Now what do I do?!
MARISSA
You gotta come clean.
RILEY
(feeling hesitant)
Okay. Zeke can you come here?!
Zeke walks into Riley’s bedroom.
ZEKE
What?
RILEY
You remember the whole thing with
you looking at porn on my laptop?
ZEKE
(confused)
Yeah?
RILEY
Well, I thought that you needed to
be punished. So I brushed my teeth
with your toothbrush.
Zeke gags in disgust.
RILEY (CONT’D)
Wait, there’s more. Kendall, you
know my ex, told me that he might
have mono so I might’ve given it to
you.
ZEKE
OK, now I gotta lay down!
MARISSA
Look, Zeke, we don’t know for sure
yet.
ZEKE
That don’t matter! That’s just
nasty!
RILEY
Look, Zeke, I’m sorry. I didn’t
mean for this to happen. But you
really hurt me.
ZEKE
Well, I guess was a douchebag. I’m
sorry Riley,
RILEY
I’m sorry, too.
Riley and Zeke hug.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – THE NEXT WEEK
Zeke is in his bedroom on his computer, when Riley suddenly
walks in. He immediately turns around.
ZEKE
(nervous)
Hi, Riley.
RILEY
I’ve got great news!
ZEKE
(nervous)
What’s that?
RILEY
Mom just got off the phone with the
doctor! We don’t have mono!
ZEKE
Yeah, that’s great! But, uh, I was
kinda in the middle of something.
RILEY
In the middle of what?
Riley all of a sudden looks disturbed when she sees Zeke’s
computer screen.
RILEY (CONT’D)
I think I know what it is. I’ll
leave you to it.
Riley runs out of the room, and Zeke smirks to himself.
The First Thing I Wrote Involving My Characters from the The Eccentrics
I began this short film sometime in early 2011. Maybe it was about February or March. I don’t know. I don’t remember And I suppose that does not really matter in the grand scheme of things. As I have said before, I had been thinking about The Eccentrics since the fall of 2007. However, other than some episode titles, I had never written down any stories for them. They were all stored in my brain. At that time in early 2011, I finally wrote down one episode idea. It involved Riley and her brother Zeke and a conflict between the two of them. However, it was incomplete. I had only written the first scene. I knew that I had not yet developed everything enough to write a full episode. Therefore, I just wrote that draft the best I could.
Many months later, I shared this on the forum. I received a rather poor response. One was that it was hilariously awful. Another comment was that the dialogue was too unrealistic. One was that the entire premise was too implausible. All of that really distressed me.
A couple of months later, I made a forum post about how I find it so hard to make a story plausible enough to allow for willing suspension of disbelief; I felt that having to stay within the bounds of reality was stifling to the creative processes, and that doing so was so frustrating that I felt that I should steal people’s life stories, so that I can guarantee that the story is realistic. Other forum users responded. One person said that it seems as though I can’t decided whether I want the story to be plausible or not and the MacGuffin, if it can be called that, of the story was implausible along with the dialogue. I re-posted my screenplay as well as the entire summary of planned storyline for it and I asked for advice and asked the user how he would have written the story. He said that there was no way to fix the plot because of the MacGuffin. I got the idea that he felt my screenplay was devoid of substance and that I didn’t see; he said that he never said it had no substance, though in my mind at least, if a story can’t be improved, then it has nothing of value. Another user then basically broke down party by part what I had completed of the story, saying that the dialogue was vapid, choppy and old-fashioned; that Riley’s actions were implausible; and that the story had undeveloped characters and huge plot holes. Another person suggested advice that I should use contractions in my dialogue; he also said that my MacGuffin was poor, which echoed the rest of the sentiment concerning the MacGuffin and that I should change it.
I decided to finish the story and change the dialogue to make it more realistic, but in the meantime, I will share with all of you my summary and that draft that I had shared with that forum. I hope you can recognize the MacGuffin, if it can be called that, and everything that was wrong with this incomplete first draft.
A girl is upset that her brother used her socks to masturbate with. Later on as he accuses her of making too big of a deal about it, she decides to get revenge by using his electric toothbrush to masturbate with. Later her ex-boyfriend tells her that he thinks he has an STD and that she should get herself checked. All of a sudden she begins to feel guilty about the possibility that she exposed her own brother to an STD. Then her brother starts complaining of symptoms and she feels worse. She confesses what she did. Then her brother reveals that he heard her using his toothbrush, and also overheard her telling her friend about possibly having an STD. He lied about having symptoms to teach her a lesson. Then she goes to the doctor and finds that she has no STD and is also told that STDs cannot be spread via toothbrushes as the bacteria cannot survive outside the body.
INT. RILEY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Riley walks into her bedroom wearing a bathrobe and shower cap. She goes into her drawers and picks up some clothes. She sees looks at a pair of her socks, drops the rest of her clothing and storms into her brother Zeke’s room. Zeke is sitting at his computer. Riley turns his chair around and show him her sock.
RILEY
What is this?
ZEKE
A sock.
RILEY
Don’t play dumb? What is this stain on my sock.
ZEKE
I thought it was mine. Then I realized it wasn’t, but it was so soft I kept on…
RILEY
Say no more! That is so gross. Now my sock is ruined and I spent a lot of money from them.
ZEKE
Well, it was stupid to buy socks for 200 dollars.
RILEY
You didn’t see the woman who sold them to me. Her boyfriend got her pregnant and left her four times. She was broke and desperate. But anyway, that doesn’t change how I feel. Use your own socks or articles of clothing next time.
Riley walks out of the room
ellisanthonyandysuttonjr 